I heard this weekend the most amazing revolutionary sentence since "he"s just not that into you." Ladies brace yourself, Men keep certain girls around because they need someone to fall back on. Usually it is a good girl and usually this girl has more than one man who uses her for this purpose. It's not the girl's fault it's just she is a catch and most men that pass through her life will keep going back. When I heard this it all made sense. Every guy that has ever did me wrong came back and tried to start up again. Why? Because men, from what my friend told me, are afraid to be alone but want to be single. So they keep good girls around to fall back on. Use a chair douche bags!!

understanding doesn't make me feel better

In three months my group of school friends have been through a lot. We graduted and now out lives have changed. Within these last three months I lost two friends from the group. One went back home and the other, well it's complicated. Just because I understand why our group isn't what it was anymore doesn't take the pain away. I do get it. I broke up with Jeff and James went home, but it's a shame it couldn't stay the same.

womans intuition?

I've never been the type of person to have a intuition. I don't believe all woman to have it because I never did. So when something is telling me not to trust you I'm not sure if its intuition or paranoia. If you never had it before why would it come now right? Does intuition come to anyone, Or do you have to always have it? Maybe I quit feeling and try looking for signs and tell my brain what to do.

daydreaming

Lately I have been getting tired of daydreaming. Whether its a silly one, a fantasy, or whatever its making me sad afterward. I know it won't happen so it makes me depressed a little. Why daydream then?

maybe more is my fault then i let on

Dare I say I've even made mistakes in my past. Even in relationships. It is hard to believe I know because I've been so disappointed by men lately or my whole life. I do have this stick up my ass I understand. However, I am growing older and with that comes wisdom. This new found wisdom I have discovered within myself is even a little shocking to myself. Maybe I should not be in a any relationship now. I know I want to be single and be by myself. But the shocking part is I like being alone. I don't want to have to call a guy and say I am home from work. I do not have to split my time. I enjoy being a little selfish. I haven't decided if this is sad or good. But wither way I'm going to enjoy my limited time being selfish.

After a closer look into myself I've realized i have to get myself off this high horse I'm on and that I am not as good as I thought I was. I use to be so good and lately I"ve surprised myself. I need to remember some things Jesus has taught me.

some people need to understand

If you really knew me you would know I really don't hate men or love. I'm not bitter or some girl that has incredible high standards, I just have standards. One thing most men need to understand is I do not respond the way you expect I am not being a bitch or a snob, I'm just not impressed by you. I was raised with expectations they aren't unrealistic its just one simple thing I expect respect because I give you some. I do understand that most men will not understand this and that's fine with me because I do not need them in life. I just want them to make sure they know I'm not the girl they could pull that bullshit with. they do on the other girls but I am older, prettier, wiser, and have met men that don't give me bull shit. I know the male gender can do it its just most of them don't choose to because they want it easy.